Sisters and Church

Saturday was Neil’s first of five Saturday’s that he has to work. I was prepared to have a pretty lazy day at home and maybe run to the mall and do some shopping. Saturday morning my sister, Steph, called and asked if I wanted to come up to Watertown and go to State Gymnastics with her and my other sister, Melissa. I wasn’t going to turn down a chance to spend time with my sisters. Even though I’m just two hours away it’s not often that all three of us get to be together without kids or other family. I am very glad I went. We went to gymnastics from 11-2 and then went to Guadalajara’s for lunch and margaritas. The second session started at 5 so we wasted some time wandering Menards, Target, and Wal-Mart and then I dropped them off before heading home. I’m glad I went, not because the day was overly exciting, but because I got to spend time with my sisters. I’m amazed every time we’re together, now that we’re all grown-up and over the sibling rivalry/fighting, because even though there are three of us, there’s no third wheel. Gymnastics is definitely something they have in common, but I never once felt left out, and we don’t get bored with each other, even if we’re looking at paint colors or shopping for necessities rather than fun stuff. The three hour drive was even worth it and I hate driving! I am just thankful to live close enough for impromptu sister days.

Sunday Neil and I officially became members of a church! We have been attending Embrace regularly since July and love it. We had to take two classes and then fill out some paperwork to become members. We finished our second class on Thursday and just had to turn in paperwork to make it official. Sunday morning was also the morning that the church officially became a chartered church so we thought that would be a great day to turn in our paperwork and become members. It feels great to be members of a church and I can cross another thing off my list of 101 Things to do in 1001 Days!

Too Personal

Anyone beginning to read this I will warn you right now this post is going to be a rant. Your choice to continue or not…

I was watching a talk show the other day and they were discussing questions that are just too personal to ask someone. One of the questions really hit home. Neil and I have been married nine months now and I can’t even count the number of times we’ve been asked this question, even prior to our wedding day. It’s a question we’ve heard from family, friends, co-workers, and people we barely know. I definitely don’t know where people got the idea that it’s an okay question to ask, but the dreaded question that I hear far too often is: “So, when are you going to have children?”

There are so many reasons I think this question is far too personal to ask anyone. First of all, what if the couple doesn’t want children, there are people that are happy without and never see themselves as wanting a child. Neil and I are definitely kid people and want children, but I don’t see anything wrong with not wanting kids. It’s a personal decision. Secondly, there is the possibility the couple can’t have children, is trying and not succeeding, or has suffered one or more miscarriages. If any of these are the case then the question just opened a very deep wound.

Maybe others don’t agree with me. Maybe this isn’t that personal of a question to them. I was raised in a very close, but private, family. We don’t ask a lot of questions because we know when a person’s ready they’ll come to us and talk. I am by far the least private person in my family and talk about most things very openly. Yet, I am so thankful that this question has never been asked of me by my parents or siblings.

I understand that I live in South Dakota and almost everyone marries and has children. Maybe that’s why people don’t think it’s a personal question. Just realize that before you ask what seems like a simple question that you have no idea what is going on with the couple and the question may not be quite as simple as you mean it to be.  

Just What I Needed

When I first started at ACS the office closed whenever the Sioux Falls Public schools closed, just to stay consistent. In December the closing guidelines were changed so that two people in our office decide when to close and when not to. This morning the Sioux Falls Public schools were closed and on my drive to work I was thinking how great it would be if our office was closed. I had so much stuff sitting at home that I haven't been able to catch up on lately. This weekend we went back to Clark for my nephew's first birthday party, Monday I was having stomach issues and spent the evening on the bathroom floor, and yesterday I just wanted some time relaxing with my husband! So this morning I was wishing for a free day at home to catch up. When I got to work I found that one of the ladies that has the power to close the office decided that we would be closed today. Yippee! I was so excited, I didn't even mind that I had already gotten ready for work and been there for an hour when the decision was made. I went straight home and made a list (I'm a list person) and started crossing things off. I am happy to say that everything is finished and it's only 4:00pm! This means I can now work on some of those boxes that we haven't quite unpacked yet and get supper made before Neil's home at 6pm.

Here's what I proudly accomplished today:
-pictures (finally) hung in our bedroom
-entire house dusted
-bathroom cleaned
-kitchen counters cleared off
-ALL the dishes done AND put away
-garbage taken out
-kitchen swept
-all the laundry washed, folded, AND put away
-Brownie's spilled dog food swept up
-fridge cleared out of leftovers
I was even able to have lunch with my husband and take an hour nap, Brownie very nicely curled up at the foot of the bed and remained quiet the entire hour!

In the middle of getting all of this done it struck me that God is once again looking out for me. Just this morning I had been thinking and praying for a day off because I have been unable to take any time off since the other Community Relations Support quit and they haven't hired a new one yet. Sioux Falls schools never close and the weather's not even that bad, yes it's cold, but it's SD. I had gotten to work just fine and we could have easily stayed open, but we didn't. All of this I have to thank Him for. He knew I needed a catch up day and only He could have made it happen for me. So once again I am in awe and so very, very thankful.

Difficult Times

This past week has been very difficult for a couple people that I love very much. The first is my sister-in-law and her husband. Last Wednesday they welcomed their second child, a beautiful baby boy. Thursday when they were supposed to be discharged from the hospital and take him home they found instead he needed to be admitted to the NICU. He is doing much better, but he still remains there and unable to go home for a few more days at least. The only thing I can do is pray. Pray for my newest nephew to heal quickly, pray for strength for his parents, and pray for the doctors and nurses who are caring for him. I believe this is helping him, as does my sister-in-law. Every prayer helps him to heal.

The second person is one of my best friends. Saturday was supposed to be the happiest day of her life thus far, her wedding day. Heartbreakingly, her fiancé called off the wedding last Wednesday. I sat on the phone with her telling me what happened in utter disbelief. I did not know what to say to her. What do you say to someone whose whole word was just flipped upside down? I’ve been through bad break-ups before where I felt like the world had ended, but that’s not even comparable to this. I told her God has a plan, even if she can’t see or understand now, and she agreed. She knows God will help her through this and has a better plan for her life, but right now, it’s hard to stay focused on that. Again, all I can do is pray. Pray that God is with her, that He helps her through this.

Difficult times, whether my own or someone I love, allow me to become even closer to God. I am so very thankful for that relationship. I am thankful that I know Him and believe that He is always there. When I feel helpless, when there is nothing I can say or do to heal someone’s pain, I know He can. When I’m in pain I know He’s with me. Right next to our front door, we have a frame with a quote that says, “When you see only one set of footprints in the sand, it was then that He carried you.” I know this is true. I believe He carried me through my dad’s 14-month deployment. That is the most difficult thing I have ever gone through and although it was only six years ago I barely remember it. This last Christmas I was trying to remember the Christmas we had when my dad was in Iraq and I can’t, it’s like he never left. Someday my sister-in-law and friend will know that feeling. For now, I pray for them to get through one day at a time.

One of Those Days

A couple days ago I was having one of those days; a day where you just want to lay in bed with the blanket over your head and not face the world. I felt like I was moving through the entire day like a robot. When I got home in the evening I didn’t know what to do. My husband’s typically very chatty when he gets home from work and would notice if I wasn’t and I really didn’t want to talk about what was going on. I know my husband’s amazing, but sometimes he still surprises me. When he got home he sat with me on the couch with his arms around me, not saying a word. We sat like that for a long time until finally he suggested that I go take a shower to relax and then we could lie in bed and watch TV. He started the shower for me and when I stepped out of the shower there was a glass of red wine sitting on the counter for me. After I was ready for bed I went downstairs and found him just coming inside from taking Brownie out. I went and gave him a hug and simply said thank you. It amazes me each day how much this man knows me and understands me when I don’t even understand myself. Days like that I’m reminded how much God has blessed me and how thankful I am that He brought Neil into my life. Some days I need that reminder, this past week I have needed it daily, and I just want my husband to know how much I love and appreciate him and how thankful I am for him.

New Year's Resolution

Neil and I have a New Year tradition where we sit down and write down our top ten blessings from the previous year and list individual resolutions along with resolutions as a couple. I have been doing this for years on my own, but last year I told Neil about it and he wanted to do it also. On New Year we sat down with a glass of wine and started listing blessings and resolutions. I love looking over the past year and thinking about how blessed my life has been. I also enjoyed when Neil told me his top ten blessings and realized that they’re almost identical. The resolution part is tough; we try to be as realistic as possible so we don’t just set ourselves up for failure. We set the resolution and then go back through them and discuss how we’re going to achieve it and hold each other accountable. A resolution that each of us set was to read through the entire Bible within the next year. We weren’t sure where we wanted to start or if we would just go front to back, as always God helped us!

Sunday morning we were listening to the sermon in church on New Life Resolutions and the importance of focusing on living for Him all the time. Our pastor started talking about a website that he uses called YouVersion. It’s a website that gives you reading plans for the Bible; you can choose reading plans for reading the entire Bible in a certain amount of time, topical readings, devotional, etc. and it will provide you with readings each day to accomplish your goal. When I got home I visited the website and signed up for a yearly reading plan and it’s worked great! Every day it provides us with readings and also shows our progress towards completing our goal.

Unfortunately, not all of our resolutions will be so simple to stick to throughout the entire year!

Week Off

American Cancer Society closed their offices from December 24^th-January 2^nd, giving me a week off to celebrate the holidays! I was so excited to have a week at home, work on unpacking, make the house more ours, and just relax! My week, as usual, wasn’t as productive as I would have liked, but things come up. With getting ready for Christmas, celebrating Christmas, unpacking Christmas presents, going to Jeff’s basketball game, babysitting Kayla, getting our apartment completely cleaned and keys turned in, having a health check for life insurance, going to an eye appointment, and spending some much needed time relaxing with my husband the unpacking is still not done! I was able to get my closet organized and clothes put away and laundry done though! I also made homemade banana bread and used my bread maker for the first time. We also learned that we can trust Brownie more and let him run around the house during the day when we’re not there. I’m sure we’ll still have accidents from time to time, but he did very well. Before last week we were afraid we may have to give Brownie up because we felt horrible having to keep him kenneled while we were at work and at night, but now we know he is more potty trained than the Humane Society thought. I am so thankful I had the week off and am okay that we still have unpacking to do, the house is livable and we have the necessities put away, the rest will get done as we find time!